Sweet friends who happen to read this bit of life fluff, thank you.
You are the truest.
I left this blog alone for a while because I just couldn’t quite figure out how to do life and turn a blog into a job that made money. A job that made money and took time and became obligation and then became well, misery in Macbook form.
The reason I named this post what I did was because I think that a lot of online sources and social media presence’s are really out there to make you think you can curate a life like their’s if you buy what they’re selling. None of it is authentic. None of it is necessarily wrong but I think the more time we spend pretending our lives consist of beautiful spotless homes or perfectly behaved children, the less time we spend connecting with real people who are willing to say hey, life is shit sometimes but also look at these pretty Christmas decorations.
As someone who is trying to get people to read what I put out, I find myself following rules that I don’t really believe in.
Post for your audience.
Know the right people.
Make the right connections.
Track your Instagram following, Facebook following, Twitter following.
Track how many pageviews each post is getting.
It stresses me out and I have a 2 year old so stress has been a solid friend lately and I’m not in need of more of it.
I just want to do what I want to do. *she says as she stomps her feet*
But seriously, I don’t want to follow blogging rules. I don’t want to stick to only posts about motherhood or only posts about feminism. I don’t like being pigeonholed.
I want to share with you. That’s pretty much it.
If authenticity is what is being asked of me, here’s what’s authentic:
I am a feminist, who is a mother, who hates capitalism but can’t step away from consumerism. I like to talk about potty training, the shoes I bought yesterday, that poem about silencing women that makes me cry, the order from Sephora I just put in, the glory of linen bed sheets and the way patriarchy affects the way you walk down a street at night. Sometimes I tell people I’m busy when I’m actually laying in bed spooning my cat and making wishlists on Pinterest.
When it comes to what I write about, even that gets disingenuous if I have to stick to certain topics. I can’t bare my soul every Thursday afternoon at the exact moment where blogging traffic is at its peak. I can’t string up the perfect set of keywords for my SEO ranking when I’m trying to share a poem about depression. I don’t work that way. Also, only ever writing opinion pieces gets emotionally overwhelming. I soak that shit up and become a useless sobbing mess who can’t function for 3 days.
So, I’m going to befriend you via blogging the way I would befriend you over coffee and treats. I’m going to talk about ALL the things. Not just the important things but the unimportant ones too. Like hey, I’m working with Hairstory and their shampoo is the bomb. Or, did you hear that Donald Trump is actually the heir of Slytherin?
I’m not going to worry about the professionality of every post or whether it suits my brand. If you only want beauty posts from me, well that’s not what this place is. You’re gonna get beauty and story and poetry and a hodgepodge of feelings you never knew one person could have.
The ability to be professional has always been a struggle for me. I want so badly to use big words and wow you with my understanding of the world but Jack just grabbed his bits and said “Aw he’s sad.” and I want you to laugh at that.
You follow?
I hope so because I really should be folding the mountain of laundry that’s been slowly gaining height over the last week but I wanted to tell you that I’m still here and I still want to have virtual coffee with you. I still want to yell via capslock about this blindingly unpleasant world. I also want to show you the new shoes I bought for $40 from JCrew’s mad Black Friday sale.
I love you friends. You’ve made this experience worthwhile and that’s why I never really left. You’re like the hot ex boyfriend I can’t stay away from.
PEACE
PS. In light of some unfortunate events (cough Donald Trump cough White Supremacy cough) I wrote some poems and put them in an ebook. If you’re in the mood for some angst, you should probably type your email below and I can send it your way. Sometimes my soul just needs to rage.
Yes to all of this. I feel the same about my blog – sometimes I think, I should probably try to be serious about this thing – care more about followers and not swearing and having better titles that make better pins…. Then I kind of hate it all, and I go back to just chatting and sharing what I want, when I want. It makes for a much happier me. Excited to have discovered your blog recently, and that you’re back posting! Can’t wait to read more.
Thank you so much Stephanie! This makes my heart so happy. Yes to the making better titles for pins!
I couldn’t do shit with SEO for this post but it’s one of my favorites. When I try too hard, I just can’t be real. I’m happy you feel this way too! <3
I just happened to find your blog one day, read one post and immediately added you to my “reading list” on my phone. This post makes my heart happy. I’m excited to stick around and read what you have to say.
Lara! This is the nicest thing I’ve heard all week. Thank you for making my day! <3
“…life is shit sometimes but also look at these pretty Christmas decorations.”
Yes. Yes to this. We can live in both these spaces at once.
I love this!
I have problems with professionalism, too. And my blog so reflects that. It’s so nice to see someone else share the same concerns (and on such a wonderful, thoughtful blog)!
Yes. I’m a newbie blogger and THIS is what I want. To just write and blab and share. Thank you!!
Just happened upon your blog, love everything about this post!! Blogging and social media can seem like such a rat race. I enjoy real life content – the random, nitty gritty, stream of consciousness, perfectly imperfect, and RELATABLE stuff. You do you!!
Hey. I really like that piece because I can totally relate. I mean yes we need to focus on important things but I also think that the little details in between are also super important. It adds to us being simply human. Your writing is appreciated.